Friday, June 25, 2010

Time to Wake Up and Smell the Goat!

I had occasion today to call up a kid and tell him he had won a book prize in a reading contest. His response rather than "Cool!" or "Wow! Really!?" was simply "okay." He was distinctly underwhelmed. I felt like saying to him "Listen kid, this might be the best f*cking thing that will ever happen to you in your life! You could sound a tad more enthusiastic. Books don't grow in trees, you know!" (Well, okay, maybe not that last bit, since books grow from trees, if not in them.)

My point is: kids seem to have such high expectations these days and don't think there will be a goat on their horizon. Let me explain.

Remember that game show from the 70s, "Let's Make a Deal", where lucky contestants (if so chosen by the affable, yet God-like Monty Hall) could get the chance to choose a prize behind door number 1, 2, or 3? There was a lot of hand-wringing tension in this decision, because those in the know were savvy to the fact that while there was likely a very nice prize behind two thirds of the doors, inevitably opening the other one would reveal a goat.

Decisions had consequences and a bad decision could result in a pungent, gamey goat.

In kids' contests and competitive games these days, it seems everyone gets to win and nobody gets stuck with the goat. They don't expect the goat, so they aren't wary of encountering it in the choices they make.

Kids, I'm here to tell you: the goat is still here and sooner or later it's going to bite you in the ass (and chew your pants off while it's at it.) So, wake up and smell the goat.

And when you win a free book, act excited for Christ's sake!

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